Call of Death
by Virus-of-the-Mind666
Summary: Sadly--sarcasm, April was killed, Chris finds that he had had feelings for her--too late --; But then while Jalil tries to comfort, he realizes he never did have feelings for April. Rated R for later...God, I hope this story turns out better than this sum


Author's Note: I'm really not sure how this story is going to go down...I just started writing since my other mini me was pestering me...*sigh* I had just gotten finished reading a great fanfic, *cough*mine*cough* No, I'm just kidding, but it was 'The Silver Lining' by...umm, crap. Whatever. Anyway~! This is my first Everworld fanfic, like I said, I don't really know if it's going to even be yaoi, I'll probably figure it out as I go. I definitely know that it's most likely going to have angst. I've been in that mood lately. All my stories are supposedly "depressing and morbid," but, since I, quote, "have as much warmth as a meat locker," end quote, I really do not know... you people have be the judge for me. I've also been called, quote, "A narcissistic sociopath with serious sadistic problems," end quote. Pfft. As if they know! Heh, I think I'm done. I sort of twisted this story, sort of...just please read, you'll understand. This will have some lyrics in here in random parts where I see fit...if you want to know the artist or the name of the song, feel free to just ask. Title: Call of Death By: NightStalker666 Summary: Sadly, April was killed. Yeah, boo hoo, wah...I'm depressed, blah, blah, blah, kiss my ass. Anyway, Chris thought he had feelings for her, and slowly spirals down into darkness, but realizes his feelings might have not rung true when Jalil attempts to comfort, and he feels emotions he should not be feeling. Chris desperately tries to push Jalil away, but in turn, Jalil refuses... Damn, I hope this stories better than this summary sounds. -_-; Disclaimer: I do not own Everworld. 'Nough said.  
* * * * * * * * * * Life holds so many twisted paths for you, that sometimes, you fear the darkness that clouds your vision as your twirl about, struggling to get a glimpse of the future. Despite this, some people try to conquer fate, and try to make decisions for their own lives. Some succeed, but most do not. Something happens that alters your course so greatly, you're left reeling, and confused. Sometimes, it's even a chain event, where one affair triggers many more, leaving you hesitant about the very ground you even stand on. You're left suspicious, paranoid...hopeless.  
* * * * * * * * * * *Chris' POV* I always think to myself, 'if...' If I hadn't been such a smartass, April would've been alive. If I hadn't provoked Hel, then she would've been alive. I like to think that if I hadn't even come here to Everworld, sucked into this depressing vortex of time, she would've survived. Everything would've changed. Life could be so fucked up sometimes. I don't even know why I had come to the lake; it had just beckoned to me, my feet traveling against my wishes. What's wrong with me sometimes, I wonder. Most of the time, I do stuff that strikes me as stupid, but I go ahead and do it anyway. It can't be helped...which is how I fell in love with that witch. Senna. She's the reason for everyone's misery...and April's death. Damn fucking bitch. If she survived from this hellhole, she wouldn't survive me... I snapped away from my reverie when I noticed that David was talking to me. "What?" I asked, looking at him blankly. "Um, we're going to be staying here for a while. We think it's safe, just wanted to let you know. There's food downstairs, so, if you're hungry, it's down there," David explained, running a hand through his hair. "Oh, and, Jalil's bedroom is next to yours, and mine is across from you two, just in case you needed to talk," he said, silently offering his help. I snort, completely unamused. "Sure, whatever," I answered him, shifting in my chair to face the wall, ignoring him. I heard him sigh, and his soft footsteps retreat down the length of the kitchen and into the living room of the small house we had escaped to. Nobody knows, but I feel guilt. Complete and utter guilt. It was my fault that April had gone into Hel's domain completely pissed off. I knew...I fucking knew that she had feelings for me, and I provoked her. I was so confused, so angry, so I took her...before we stumbled upon Hel's place, I took her against a tree. A tree. I laugh once, a harsh bark grating against my throat. An inescapable emotion had overwhelmed me, and while the two guys were distracted about which direction to take, I fibbed and told the two that I wanted to find some fresh water, being thirsty and all. I took April with me, and seduced her, to rid my own emotions, to feel a similar feeling. Like an animal, I had attacked her, and shoved her against a tree, not even bothering to slide my own pants down. Just unzipped my fly, and slammed into her, the zipper biting into her flesh with each frantic thrust, a cry escaping her lips every time. That had unhinged me as well. The cries of passion and pain, intermingled together, separated by a thin line. Afterwards, I had watched her coldly slide down the tree to the base, where she slumped, dazed, passion darkening her eyes. As I started to walk off, she had latched onto me, asking if we were going out. I had laughed in her face, watching the hurt flash in her eyes, and said, "If you honestly believe that we were going out, you're pretty fucking dumb. I guess you are though, huh? Being the whoring cunt that you are, taking any man who wants your pussy. Slut." Then I had walked off, and caught up with the guys, completely normal around them, my goofball self. April had come crashing through then, completely enraged. I should've known that she would be pissed, but I didn't care. I honestly didn't care. Sadly, I did when I cradled her body in my arms as she lay dying. I cared then...and I cared now. I had apologized and cried as I held her tightly to my chest, aware of her own precious lifeblood seeping into my shirt, creating a sticky barrier between us. I don't think she heard my apologies and pleas for her to live. I watched as life drained out of her eyes, leaving them glassy with death. I don't think I'll ever escape those expressive eyes slowly losing their flame. I made myself watch everything. It was my punishment for my stupidity. I realized then, and too late, that I had fallen in love with April...and had been the one to take her virginity. How stupid of me. How crass. I slowly got up, and began trudging up the stairs, ignoring the eyes I felt on my back as Jalil and David stared from the couch in the living room. Turning into the bathroom, I close and lock the door behind me, staring at my reflection in the mirror. I don't even recognize myself. I look so pale, pasty, and my blond hair hangs in oily strings down my forehead. I smile at myself, a forced smile, making me look constipated. Sliding open a drawer, I take out a razor, and take it apart, leaving only the sharp razor. Fascinated by the blade shining like a new star, I slide it down my bared arm, fully enthralled as a thin line of blood wells. Some of the drops of blood rolls down my arm, like war paint. Gazing at the razor, I lick the edge of it, catching the couple of drops of blood straying on the edge, and taste the coppery taste of my own body. I smile, this time in pleasure. The pain is a new experience for me. This time, I stab myself in the arm, and drag it down, instantly breaking countless capillaries and a vein, blood now flowing generously over the other cut. I laugh, delighted. This is too rich. This makes me forget all of my problems. I have discovered a new escape. This is amazing...this feeling...it overwhelms me, and I welcome it, allowing it to take over. I think it is the call of death. **Cut my life into pieces I've reached my last resort, Suffocation, no breathing,** Almost hypnotically, I shed my clothes, and get in the shower, twisting the knob. I gasp as the pain wracks through me in blinding white flashes as the warm water sprays directly into my cut, stinging. Moaning from the unfamiliar ecstasy it has brought me, I rest my back against the cold tiles, writhing under the onslaught of pain, warm waters soothing me, and my tormented soul, brushing me with cold fingers, seizing my heart. **When this began I had nothing to say and I'd get lost in the nothingness inside of me I was confused And I let it all out to find that I'm Not the only person with these things in mind Inside of me** Taking the razor once more, I rake it down my stomach, gasping at the pain and pleasure raging through me. Dropping the razor, I grasp my erection, standing proud and tall, the tip nearly touching my stomach. Slowly, I finger the tip as my other hand plays with my balls. I bite off a moan, drawing blood as I slowly pump, gradually picking up speed as I swallow my blood, biting more to ooze more blood, balancing on the line between pleasure and pain. With a hoarse shout, I spend myself, and weakly drop to my knees, and lay myself along the bath, ignoring the biting of the razor on my foot as I adjust my legs to fit the bathtub. As the water mingles away, tinted orange, I sigh as I close my eyes. This is a whole new feeling for me. This could get so addicting...being to empty. **But all the vacancy the words revealed Is the only real thing that I've got left to feel Nothing to lose Just stuck hollow and alone And the fault is my own And the fault is my own**  
* * * * * * * * * * AN: Okay, so what did you guys think? Should I continue this??...I should, since my summary would then be inaccurate, huh? But, please, review, and then I will determine if I shall write or not. *sigh* This is an interesting piece for me, seeing as I have no clue where I'm exactly going to go with it. *smile* Man, would some of my friends be shocked when they think that not so innocent me will be writing gay fiction and blah. Pfft. Such sheltered people. *shakes head sadly* Anyway, if you got this far, thank you for reading. *bow* Bai, bai! Remember, REVIEW!!! Oh, and if you would like to know how my mind works...lol, go to my website. It's on my profile thingy. Risk your mind if you can...although, if you're reading this, it's already tainted, huh? Eh, whatever. 


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